Proverbs

This is the first of three major sections in Proverbs that warn young men about the dangers of sexual immorality. Critics sometimes claim that these passages are demeaning to women and depict them negatively. However, the specific woman described in these passages is a prostitute or an immoral woman. While the passages are gender specific, the principles taught here are not. Sexual immorality and marital infidelity often lead to disaster and are to be judiciously avoided by both men and women. There are also men who tempt young women and try to lead them into sexual immorality, and the principles presented in these chapters must be equally applied by women. In this first section the young man is warned of the power and subtlety of the temptation (“lips . . . drip honey”; “words are smoother than oil,” v. 3) and the disaster that can result from this kind of involvement. He is instructed to stay far away from her house. Openness to instruction is a basic characteristic of the wise person, and failure to listen to instruction about proper behavior in this realm can lead to disgrace and disaster.

Eighth Paternal Appeal: Sexuality. After the introductory words in vv. 1–2, the entire appeal concerns matters of sexual morality. First, the immoral woman is introduced: she is alluring but deadly (vv. 3–6). An exhortation to stay far from such promiscuous women follows (vv. 7–14). The text then gives a brief but powerful presentation of the essentials of biblical teaching on sexual ethics. It asserts that sexual pleasure is good but that it must be confined to marriage (vv. 15–20). The passage concludes with a brief account of the woes that befall the immoral man (vv. 21–23). This illustrates the principle of “concreteness” (see Introduction: Literary Features). Of course other sexual dangers exist (such as a woman being tempted by an immoral man, temptations to homosexual conduct, incest, or sexual abuse of children), and the wise person applies this counsel by making the appropriate adaptations.

One of the purposes of attending to wisdom is that the son’s lips may guard knowledge (v. 2), that is, his lips should not let anything go out from them that is inconsistent with true knowledge and wisdom. Such “guarded” speech has the best interest of both the speaker and the hearer in view (cf. Mal. 2:7, referring to the proper function of the priest). In contrast, the lips of a forbidden woman are flattering (they drip honey, Prov. 5:3) and her words are persuasive (her speech is smoother than oil), but her own end proves her words to be hollow and destructive (vv. 4–6).

These elements of instruction are repeated in one way or another throughout the book: recognize the right path and seek to stay on it. Taking in words of wisdom is itself a part of the path (do not depart from the words of my mouth, v. 7; cf. 4:20–21), as is the good sense to keep one’s feet on the path by avoiding evil (keep your way far from her, 5:8; cf. 4:26–27).

Verses 9 and 10 begin the description of consequences (lest) for failing to heed the instruction of vv. 7 and 8. Following the lures of the forbidden woman (see note on 2:16–17) results in having what is meant for enjoyment (honor and years, 5:9; strength and labors, v. 10) being given over to others, and also produces regret over the wasting of body and soul (vv. 11–13) and shame within the corporate body (v. 14). Although the terms in vv. 9–10 (others, merciless, strangers, and foreigner) could refer to the husband and family of the woman with whom adultery would be committed (cf. 6:34–35), they need not be understood as referring exclusively to them. Proverbs often describes the foolish path as one that squanders the very good it deceptively offers (see 1:10–19).

Critics sometimes argue that passages extolling the pleasures of sex are inappropriate and should not be in the Bible. The book of Proverbs, though, sees sex as a gift from God that is to be enjoyed in the context of the commitment of marriage. An intimate relationship with one’s spouse and the physical delight such a relationship can bring is commended by Proverbs and is seen as a powerful antidote to the temptations that can lead to unfaithfulness and immorality.

The wife is pictured as the source of water in these images of “cistern,” “well,” “springs,” “streams,” and “fountain,” which is clear both in the repeated phrase from your own cistern/well (v. 15) and the conjunction of “your fountain” and the wife of your youth (v. 18). The force of v. 16 is thus to call the hearer to imagine how he would feel if his wife were to commit adultery (Should your springs be scattered abroad, streams of water in the streets?) and to follow the principle of doing unto others what you would have done to you (see Matt. 7:12; Luke 6:31), i.e., be faithful to her as he wishes her to be faithful to him.

Proverbs calls unabashedly for seeking fulfillment in the sexual intimacy of marriage (Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight … be intoxicated) as the relational context where these desires are rightly fostered for the enjoyment (rejoice in the wife of your youth) and good (Let your fountain be blessed) of both husband and wife. (Regarding “be intoxicated,” see esv footnote: Hb. “be led astray”—i.e., in the sense of being “swept away” with delight in one’s wife.)

For a man’s ways are before the eyes of the LORD (v. 21) provides the grounds for the instruction of the chapter and acts as a reminder of the promises of God’s blessing if one stays on the good path (cf. the vocabulary with 4:26). It also provides warning if one’s path is heading toward an end consistent with its nature. Being led astray (5:23; the same Hb. word as “intoxicated,” vv. 19–20, see esv footnote; thus there is ironic contrast of the two kinds of being “led astray”—one into delight and the other into destruction) by the forbidden woman can result in being held fast in … sin (v. 22) and thus in a life that lays hold (cf. esv footnote on v. 5) of the path leading to death.